Parent Support

Taking time to care for yourself is vital….

I have been light in the keeping up with the blog department these last few weeks, okay let us be honest, closer to 8 weeks probably. After spending so much time focusing on building my parent coaching business- Parent Support Network, I needed a little me time.

In addition to working with various clients I was finding a certain amount of pressure to blog regularly. My blogs are true and honest and vulnerable and I write what I feel. I don’t have a list of topics to hit just because it is that time of the week. I guess I was feeling a bit burned out. Today it struck me that in the last few months I haven’t blogged because I have been taking care of myself; which is hard for me because I feel responsible for taking care of so many others first; my family, my clients, and my friends.

What does self-care look like for me? Well, it means that I follow my interest no matter how weird or challenging they might be. I am the kind of person that the moment you tell me it’s unlikely I will meet my goal; I want to prove you wrong.

My willingness to attempt things that interest me has served me well over the years. It has taught me tenacity, resiliency, and how failure can be motivating and humbling. It reminds me where my sons got their stubbornness from, and that I need to be patient and let them learn how to build their own tenacity and resiliency.

So, while I have been absent from my blogging, I haven’t been doing nothing. I recently embarked on learning and creating new things; such as woodworking. From scratch I built a picnic table and benches, a chicken coop addition and a rabbit hutches.

I have been trying my hand at gardening-some foods I don’t even like to eat, but wanted to know if I could grow them (I do not toss out, I share with my neighbors).

And my longest and most mistake driven project to date was to re-create New Jersey bagels in Utah. While there is nothing wrong with the bagels in Utah, I was desperate for what I grew up with.

Some of my attempts went without mishap-the table and benches were flawless- I channeled my dad’s measure twice, cut once mantra. The other projects didn’t go as smoothly or without frustration. While I was doing these projects to feed my soul, I didn’t realize that in the process I was teaching and modeling behaviors for my children.

They saw me toil eight hours a day for a week to meet my personal deadline of finishing the picnic table before fathers day. They saw my ingenuity of building a new section of our chicken coop with scraps left over from the table project. They saw me build an entire rabbit hutch and then take it apart and rebuild it because I realized there was a better way to do it.

They watched me make batch upon batch of bagels and beg them to taste them. They were critical of every “not quite there yet batch”, but they were also the first ones to tell me I nailed it and could I make more when I finally got it.

I just didn’t realize that by taking care of myself, I was being a better parent to my children. So take care of yourself and I guarantee you, you will be a better parent, partner, child, grandparent, whatever you are to the people that matter in your life.

Enjoy pictures of the projects I have been working on, some turned out better than others, however perfection was never the goal, as nothing in life is perfect.

Parent Support

OMG, I am turning 50!

This Thursday July 2nd I will enter yet another decade of life as I turn 50. I am in awe that I am this “old” yet without feeling old.

I have actually enjoyed aging, as for me it seems as if life, like good wine, gets better with age.

My twenties were spent maturing and learning how to be comfortable in my own skin in an uncoupled state. I gained confidence in being bold enough to dine alone in a restaurant and took my first solo vacation.

My thirties and most of my forties were spent learning how balance full time work, marriage, and motherhood while trying not to lose myself in the process.

In the last few years of my 40’s, I desired a simplier life one in which I was kinder and gentler to my family while making my mental and physical health a priority .

Recently I have lost about 35 pounds and I am back to my old self where I can feel comfortable in my smaller, but still plus sized wardrobe. As my reward I recently went “crazy” and bought a pair of “ripped” jeans, way too hip and cool for a 50 year old. However, I did it anyway because aging has also taught me to stop worring about what others think.

I have always felt that the true me belonged on a farm, growing a garden, having animals, and in my “spare time” I would build furniture.

This was always spoken with jest because anyone who knew me, knew I didn’t like animals, I hated yardwork, and finally, I have never built anything in my life, and if I did it would probably come out wonky.

It has been in my 49th year where dreams have become a reality.

I moved from New Jersey to Utah thus fulfilling my belief that I would thrive in a more rural area, and it turned out to be true.

We now own 15 chickens and two ducks in our own coop. Our backyard neighbors have lamas, goats, mules, and more chickens. This feels very farm like to me.

I built garden boxes, and we planted our first garden ever.

Newly built garden boxes were ready for planting

And just last week I harvested broccoli, sugar snap peas, romaine lettuce, basil, parsley, lavender, and thyme.

I have been obsessed with the idea of building furniture since I was a teenager hooked on “This Old House” with Bob and Norm, the way teens today are obsessed with TikTok.

And a few weeks ago I paid homage to them when I built from scratch (no kits here) a picnic table and benches for our backyard.

Work in progress in the garage and my husband sitting on the final product, benches got stain later.

I was very proud of the end product, everything was level and square. I think my father was channeling me from heaven, as I constantly heard the words he often uttered to me when I showed little patience and wanted to rush something, “Measure twice, and cut once”; “Measure twice, and cut once” It became a mantra every time I stood in front of that miter saw ready to drop the blade.

So as I head toward 50, I realize how blessed I am that I have had the opportunity to learn so many valuable lessons in each decade of my life.

I am blessed that for me, age has brought me the confidence and wisdom to know when to push myself forward and to know when to acknowledge my limits.

When I was in my 30’s, I thought people in their 50’s were half dead, now that I am turning 50, I now know that the best is yet to come.

So to all my friends who are seeing the Big 5 Oh this year, I hope life has taught you more than you anticipated and what is yet to come is better than you ever imagined.

Happy Birthday 1970 babies.
Parent Support

A Message to all the WordPress Followers and Email subscribers.

www.parentsupportnow.com
Facebook​, ​ Instagram​​, and Linkedin​

I wanted to thank you for supporting the Parent Support Network blog.  Since its inception in October 2019 there have been almost 10,000 views of my stories. I am humbled.

The Parent Support Network has undergone a transformation and in addition to the blog, the Parent Support Network is now a Parent Coaching Company. We have a fully operational website, new Logo,  and a robust new Facebook page. 

I am requesting that you take a moment to visit the new links below, and to please Like, Follow, and Share if you continue to like the content . 

I truly have appreciated your support with my desire to share and help other families.


With much gratitude.

Cheryl Mignone, Certified Parent Coach and Founder

Parent Coaching, Parent Mentoring, Parent Support, Teenagers

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One-on-one coaching is available through the Parent Support Network. Contact me for a complimentary consultation.

Visit the Parent Support Network website to view available services and packages

Mental Health, Parent Coaching, Parent Mentoring, Parent Support

I turned into a sloth…

For the past two weeks I have been in a full blown sloth mode. My days of getting up naturally at 6am, hopping in the shower, and starting my list of tasks was abandoned. The other members of my family saw no need or urgency to accomplish anything within a time line, either for the day or week; and in reality, why should they have.

However, for me to not have a daily schedule or purpose results in me having zero motivation to do anything, and as a result everything started to look grey and dull. Definitely not the way I am used to seeing the world. My world is generally filled with joy and happiness and an occasional rainbow shooting out someones a**. My husband calls me a freakin’ Pollyanna, because I can see goodness in almost anything. I can be annoyingly optimistic.

  • My kid is struggling- “We will get through it”
  • My husband lost his job- “We will be okay”
  • Unemployment reviewing a claim- “It will all work out for the best”
  • Waiting for someone to respond to me- “I am sure there must be a valid reason”

That is until two weeks ago. After several months of this living with non-urgency crew (husband and two teens) I gave up my strongly maintained and structured schedule, and adopted the it will eventually get done attitude. This is great for a vacation, but not good for everyday life. I found my self lounging in my pajamas until noon watching the television or doing something inane like playing games on my ipad, or watching crazy people on TikTok.

I didn’t see any urgency in doing laundry, nor yard work, or anything else, as it would all get done eventually, right? Well, because of my new “attitude” the last two weeks have been the blahest of the last three months.

I need a schedule. I need a purpose. I need structure. I need to be doing something to push me forward. I now have a better understanding of how hard it is for our teens to have a sense of urgency about anything, when to them there is no immediate purpose. Why get up at 8am if there is no where to go or to be. The level of what appeared to be laziness, but I think was really apathy, eventually wore me down and I joined them.

Just this week I voiced to some friends that I have been the least productive person in the last two weeks, I felt like a slow moving no motivated sloth. Only after repeating it a few times did I realize that I had to snap out of it, and get myself back into a routine. While my family could live without urgency or a schedule, I just couldn’t.

So this week was a new start. Back to getting up early, making a To Do list and getting stuff done like the timeliness mattered. I realized, it does matter. It matters to me. I am not good being a slow moving sloth. So I have to say I feel like my old self again. I have purpose, even if that purpose is getting stuff done around the house, based upon my own personal timetable.

My mood is better, I feel human again and I feel like I have a purpose. I am back to being the me I like.